Tonya Renee El-Hendi

LCSW

I’ve learned so many meaningful tools throughout my work as a therapist and find great value in using Mindsight and understanding the science of the brain to explore why we sometimes get stuck in unhelpful thoughts and behaviors. I’ve completed extensive training in mindfulness, Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) with Dr. Dan Siegel, anxiety, ADHD, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and Dr. Jud Brewer’s work on habits and addictions (not just substances but also anxiety and food). What I love about these approaches is how beautifully they come together to help us understand how the brain works and how to create lasting change—not through willpower alone, but through awareness and compassion. I enjoy helping clients learn to talk back to their inner critic with kindness, and to get curious about what the brain “gets” from behaviors or thought patterns that don’t actually serve them. By understanding these patterns, we can open space for growth, connection, and a more fulfilling life.

After earning my bachelor’s degree, I began my career as a teacher in juvenile hall. Very quickly, I realized that I was less interested in teaching curriculum and more drawn to understanding the students themselves—what had happened in their lives and how they ended up there. At the time, I was in a teaching program, but that experience helped me discover that I wanted to be the therapist who could truly connect with and support them. I initially switched my program to school psychology, but after a couple of classes, I realized that field focused mainly on academic testing rather than direct connection. I wanted to talk to kids, not just test them. So, I transitioned again to school counseling. Over the years, I worked as a school counselor, serving foster youth and students in alternative high school settings, which deepened my desire to expand my clinical work. That led me to pursue my Master’s in Social Work (MSW). Fast forward to today, I’ve come full circle. I’m still a teacher at heart and I found the marriage of both in teach and developing MFT Trainees and Associates as part of my growing group practice, Calm Mind Therapy, Inc. I love the balance of guiding new clinicians while continuing to learn from them. That ongoing exchange makes my work with clients even more meaningful, collaborative, and deeply rewarding.

So many books have been so influential as a human and as a therapist. Right now I am back into A New Earth by Eckert Tolle. I have read this book a dozen times and each time I take something new away or see it from a different lens as my experiences in life grow. I love the connection to awareness and recognizing our identity with form and what if we were truly present and aware and how our worlds would be different. I reflect on how I can bring that into my daily life and work with clients. I also love all books written by Dr. Dan Siegel and his co-authored books. I have read all of them I believe and I use a lot of his work in how I approach parenting, mindfulness, building awareness, mindsight and the relationship between mind and the skin encased body. I just re-read the prompt that said pick one. I have many more that I often mention and reference in my therapeutic work.